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Our Story

How We Got Together

It all started one Saturday afternoon in July of 2001. At the time I was living with Toby Ward and some other cats and we decided to throw a pool party. Jeremy Rhodenhizer and Robert (Wig) Murphy came over and we were cleaning out the shed when a swam of bees decided to sting me. Not many great days start out with 8 bee stings on your belly! Well, during the pool party, a young lady by the name of Julie Winar came over, accompanied by another school teacher seeing that Julie was in Virginia interviewing for a teaching position at CRCS. Julie seemed nice enough, but she was rather quiet, as I'm sure it was a rather astonishing scene, what with my toned and tanned body lounging around the pool. :) Her visit evidently went well, as she moved to Virginia to take the job

The next time I remember seeing Julie was at a Labor Day Barbecue at the former Beth Eden (now Seidler's) house. There were about 20-30 people there, but the only person I was interested in talking to was Julie. She was cute and fun and, did I mention, cute? I didn't get to talk to her much, but I knew when I left that I wanted to get to know her better.

That chance came on September 15, when a bunch of us attended a simulcast at CRBC about leadership or something like that. Julie's dad was arriving that night with all her stuff from Cleveland and I volunteered to help him move her in. Unbeknownst to Julie, but known to just about everyone else at church, I was quite interested in her and used the moving as a great opportunity to get to know Julie and to make a good impression on her dad. What dad wouldn't want their daughter to date a hard-working, heavy-lifting guy? And trust me, that loft is heavy-lifting! I really did have a fun time with Julie and her dad and was glad I could help.

As fate would have it, my friend Jeremy was dating Julie's roommate Leslie, which provided the perfect opportunity for a double-date, which happened on September 22, 2001. The four of us went to a Baltimore Orioles game, which was very, very warm (Note to peole out there like myself that have a tendency to perspire...pick something indoors for your first date!) We had a great time and after the game stopped in Arlington, VA for sandwiches at the Lost Dog Cafe and then Julie and I went back to her place and watched "Save the Last Dance". Not a great movie, but I was glad for anytime that I got to spend with Julie. It was a wonderful day.

The next month Julie and I saw each other every day, staying up much later than a first year teacher should, just talking and enjoying each other's company. She was unlike any girl I had ever been interested in before, so much more normal and conservative and thoughtful than myself, and I loved it. We could talk about anything and, for the first time in a relationship, I felt completely accepted, never worrying that I would scare her off or do something untoward. I knew very early on how I felt about Julie, and she was very honest with what she thought, but never made me feel like I was going too fast or trying to hard. She made me feel completely comfortable, a quality that continues today. She went home to Cleveland around October 20 for her cousin Jennifer's wedding and the entire time she was gone I missed her and wondered what was going to happen when she got back. It didn't help that on the way to the airport, she and I held hands, which we had never done, and I thought and thought about it all weekend. Stress! My mind was put at ease, though, when Julie came back and we became a couple on October 22, 2001.

I was ecstatic that such a fabulous girl chose me and, when my parents met her in November when we went home to Ann Arbor for a University of Michigan Football Game, they were thrilled. If you ask Julie about that first trip to Ann Arbor, she won't remember the great talks on the drive, nor the game, nor my dad's concert. She'll recount how, on the Saturday morning after we got there Friday night, I didn't come down to her room and walk her out to meet my parents. She had to walk the long 10 feet or so of the hallway and meet my parents all by herself! Imagine that ... I'm such a terrible guy. The weekend was a lot of fun and Julie met many friends and family. That trip was also my first chance to meet Julie's family, since we switched cars at Julie's home in Cleveland. However, due to my help before with the move, Julie's family already thought good things about me! She is bitter to this day that I never had to stress about meeting her dad. :) It was great to meet everyone, although having kids around is quite a change from the Blackstone's where it's just me and my sister. Nothing like a 6 year old to liven things up. However, I had to work harder to win Jubliee's heart as Mike and Jody had captured it.

We still weren't at the point of spending the holidays together, although we did see each other over Thanksgiving, when I drove down to Cleveland on Sat morning and Julie, me, Lisa Eckert, Jodi Fox and Sarah Pollock went to a Cavs game. The drive back to VA on that Sunday was not very much fun as the traffic was ridiculous. Taught us a lesson that we wouldn't learn each of the next 2 times we drove from Cleveland back to Virginia. Doh!

That February brought my first Valentine's ever where I had a girlfriend. I was stressing big time about what I should get her. We hadn't yet said "I love you", but I knew it. My sister Heather suggested I get Julie a very pretty necklace from Tiffany, but as I had never bought jewely for a girl, I was unsure. I decided to follow the guidance of my wise sister, and got the necklace for Julie, and every time I see it on her neck, it reminds me of that special first Valentine's. As I love grilling, that night for dinner I grilled chicken and made broccoli and cheese (Julie's favorite) and rolls and we had a romantic night at my place. Her present was incredibly thoughtful and meaningful - she bought me a new bible and had my name inscribed on the front. To know that we share a common faith and Lord is such a wonderful bond and to know that she wants me to grow in my faith and bought me a new guidebook to help me in that is almost hard to put into words. I could not have asked for a more godly wife and that Valentines served as the starting point for all the other things Julie has done to remind me of the necessity of putting Christ before all.

Not a month later came Julie's birthday. This was the first time I'd ever celebrated the birthday of the girl was dating. Julie was actually out of town on the day of her birthday, but we celebrated when she got back, and this is where my memory gets vague and this is where I stop listing all of the gifts Julie and I have gotten each other cause I'll embarass myself.

The next big event for Julie and I was going home to Ohio and Michigan, respectively, in July of 2001. Ostenibly, we went home for Sarah Pollock's (now Fox's) wedding, but it was really the first chance I would have to spend a lot of time with Julie's family and meet many of her childhood and college friends. It was a great trip, save for the interminable traffic on the way back to DC. Stupid us, we left on the sunday after July 4th. The wedding was beautiful and we had great fun with Jody and Sarah, Paul and Ellen and many others. I think I passed the inspection. :)

For my birthday that year, Julie suprised me with a Monster's Inc theme birthday party, complete with cake featuring a very well-done likeness of Mike, as well as napkins, cups, plates, the whole kit-and-kaboodle. It was awesome.

And that was our first year together.... I just realized how long this turned out to be. I never realized I'm such a windbag!

The Proposal

So, the summer of 2003 seems like everyone of our friends got married. And, boy, it sure is fun when people keep asking you "So, when are you and Julie getting married?"! In the fall of 2003, I started thinking pretty seriously about asking Julie to marry me, but I wanted to keep it as secret as possible. I planned to spend time over Thanksgiving looking for a ring, and hopefully find one. Julie and I had gone looking at rings prior to that, but the only direction she had given me is that she didn't want yellow gold and didn't want marquee cut. So, the range is from this to this... not very helpful. I had no clue how to proceed.

When I was home for Thanksgiving, I happened to go out to lunch with Dan Klyn, a mutual friend of Bill Burns. Dan does some amazing work for Q LTD in Ann Arbor and is, like me, a professional web person. We went out for Chinese and I got talking about Julie and shopping for rings. He mentioned that he bought his wife's ring at the Arcadian, an antique store in Nickells Arcade in Ann Arbor, MI, and I should check it out. As Julie had mentioned that she liked antique-looking rings, Dan's suggestion was on point and I went to look.

Everything about my experience at The Arcadian was great. Rhonda, the owner, was super nice and explained all the ring terminology to this neophyte. There were some beautiful rings, including one that, had I bought it for Julie she would have killed me for spending so much, but there was only one perfect one for her. I looked at a couple of other places, but I knew the ring at The Arcadian was the one.

Now that I had bought the ring, I still had 2 major steps. 1) I had to ask Julie's dad for permission to ask her to marry me and 2) I actually had to ask her. Number 1 was accomplished while I was in Cleveland at the end of my Thanksgiving vacation. Due to the presence of numerous non-adult persons, I had to have Julie run interference so I could have some time alone with her dad. I didn't want to do it that way, but it was the only way. I was super nervous, but Julie's dad was very gracious and did give me his blessing. It meant alot that he made a point to mention that he and Julie's mom have always hoped and prayed that their children would find Christian spouses and that they were glad Julie and I found each other.

And now the really hard part, asking Julie. First off, I couldn't take a chance of her finding out that I was going to ask her, so I told absolutely no one in Virginia that I had a ring. Not even my good friends at church and work who I flat out lied to, sorry Dave, knew what I was planning. The Circle of Trust was very small, but it had to be that way.

I knew I wanted to do ask Julie at the FDR Memorial since that is probably Julie and my favorite place in DC. The trick was how to get down there without making it look like a setup. Julie provided me with the perfect setup when she expressed interest in seeing the National Christmas tree. The last time we tried to see the tree it was about -10000 degrees, so I wasn't all that keen on it, but, luckily, December 9, 2003 turned out to be a mild evening. I suggested to Julie that we stop by FDR before we headed to the National Christmas Tree to walk around, which was fine by her. I wanted to do it first because I knew I couldn't wait until after we saw the tree to ask her.

As for the actual words I was going to say, I was completely unsure about that. After thinking about it a lot, I decided to have the proposal play as a slide show on my camera. I would bring it along to take pictures of Julie at the memorial and at the tree and, when she came back to look at the picture I took, I would play "I LOVE YOU WILL YOU MARRY ME?". Hmmm, wonder how it went?

So, we went down to the FDR memorial on December 9, 2003. We walked around for a bit then I asked to take her picture in front of one of the fountains (pic here). After I took her picture, I told her to come over and look at it, while I started the camera playing the proposal. I got down on one knee and said "Julie, would you do me the honor of being my wife?" She said "Yes" and I'd never been happier. I put the ring on her finger and we hugged and kisses ( I know, gross).

Fortuitously, a park ranger just happened to be walking by right after I proposed, so we had him take a bunch of pictures (here, here, here, and here).

After I asked Julie, we both took turns calling friends and family, which was great fun. Then we walked to the National Christmas Tree, which was quite beautiful, and took some pretty good pictures there as well (here, here, here, and here). It was an absolutely perfect night and, up to that point, it was the happiest day of my life. However, each day since then Julie has made me even happier and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with her.